The Five Stages of Self-Discovery while Abroad

 I remember writing this from my office desk around March of this year, as I idled time away on a not-so-busy day. Tweaked it a bit after coming home. Here is my attempt to demystify the stages of self-discovery while working abroad, in city like Hong Kong. 

The first stage of finding yourself in Hong Kong is novelty, just like in any other foreign city. It’s discovering how different you are by literally “sensing” your way around the place. It’s taking in your surroundings and filling your senses with the distinct smell of roasted barbeque pork, the iconic sight of Hong Kong’s majestic skyline, the orchestrated sound of footsteps rushing as soon as the beeping of MTR gates are heard, or the Panda you wish you could touch, pet and feed bamboo shoots to in Ocean Park. As soon as you enter Hong Kong’s airport you know that this city is not for the faint of heart, because here, your senses need to keep up, and so does your walking pace.

The next stage of finding yourself is called exploration. Let novelty fill you with boundless energy to explore Hong Kong through its tram system, MTR system, bus system, ferry system, or better yet, by hiring a junk boat, biking on its outlying islands, hiking its mountains, walking through its night markets, or by plain fumbling through its nooks and crannies and discovering something new every time. Explore Hong Kong and become the tease, saint, intellectual or socialite you have always wanted to be. All the world is a stage in this land of possibilities, with your backdrop and audience changing each time.

The next stage is called confusion. As you have many crazy adventures you start thinking if this is the person you want to be, and swear that you’ll mellow down. But then you do it again… and again… and again… whatever “it” may be. Wake up calls come in the form of a person from your not-so distant past– a friend, a significant other or a family member, who had been neglected as you continue living in an alternate universe frozen in time.

As your over-fatigued body catches up with the busy lifestyle you lead, you are forced into isolation, and forced into a period of reflection. Some opt for yoga retreats, others live in remote islands, some simply stay in during weekends, and others book trips home or book trips to the nearest third-world paradise. This period is crucial not just to re-energize, but also to realize the things that are truly worth it. In fact, you realize that there is an end to begin with, like many other good things in this world.

If you choose to stay or move on, either way you will reach a state of enlightenment, the final stage of this journey. It’s enlightenment that comes with knowing what you are capable of in this place of numerous possibilities, drawing your limits, and sticking with your decisions and whatever consequences they bring. Living in the present takes a whole new meaning, because now the present involves how you integrate your past with the future you anticipate, versus its old connotation of simply going with the flow.

And so, to find yourself in Hong Kong is to find a way to return to who you are amidst its many clashing values and propositions. It’s knowing that when you leave, you achieved the reason you came in the first place, from the choices you made during your brief yet wondrous stay in this city for gods and men.